Cuddle up with a box of chocolates, roses, and a boat load of blood.

I don’t know about you guys, but my ideal Valentine’s Day consists of hunkering down in my apartment, eating a shit ton of chocolate, and watching a bunch of horror movies that will melt my little heart (much to my girlfriend’s dismay).

Whether you’re a couple looking for a movie night or single and dreading the very idea of doing anything on Valentine’s Day, horror movies are the prefect getaway from the corny schmaltz of romance.

I actually find Valentine’s Day to be a sort of unofficial Halloween. I mean, the heart pumps blood – and there are bucket loads dripping down the walls in horror flicks. So if you’re like me, join me as I put together the ultimate Valentine’s horror movie marathon.

 

Let the Right One In (2008)

Let the Right One In

There’s nothing more innocent the love share between two kids – before obligation and expectations ruin everything. This couldn’t be more true with Let the Right One In… except the little “girl” is actually an old vampire… and she’s also – well, I’ll let you guys watch and find out.

Full of dread and spectacular moments of violence – the most amazing part about this film is the uncompromising bond a little boy shares with his new vampire friend.
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Valentine (2001)

Valentine Slasher Film

I’ll be honest with you; this isn’t a very good movie. But I just can’t keep it off the list when it has a title that directly references the holiday. So, if you’re going to watch a by-the-numbers slasher about five women preparing for Valentine’s Day – do what I do. Get a box of wine so you are “classy” drunk enough to find all the murder funny.
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The Abominable Dr. Phibes (1971)

Dr. Phibes kiss

What could be more romantic than ever lasting love? Especially the kind of love that death can’t even stop. Throw in some Vincent Price and you’ve got me hooked for an amazing time. If true love isn’t keeping your dead wife embalmed in a coffin and avenging her death by killing the people responsible with Saw-like traps… then I don’t know what is.
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The Loved Ones (2009)

The Loved Ones Prom

A lot of people mistake obsession with love. And I’m sure there a lot of couples going out on Valentine’s dates who tip more towards the side of obsession. So let’s celebrate that fact with The Loved Ones, an unnerving little film about a teenage girl whose crush rejects her prom invitation. But instead of sulking in tears, she concocts a plan to force him into her very own prom – one filled with blood and revenge. I never got to have a prom with my girlfriend… but I somehow think this is the next best thing.
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Lover’s Lane (2000)

Lovers Lane Horror Movie

One part I Know What You Did Last Summer, one part Nightmare On Elm Street (sorta) – Lovers Lane is all about a killer with a metal hook who murders a couple on Valentine’s Day at Lovers Lane (that’s a lot of lovely irony isn’t it?). But after the killer is caught, he escapes 13 years later to kill the victim’s children.

This movie plays off of the old urban legend about the hook scratching against the car of a couple doing naughty things. It’s wonderfully juvenile. I couldn’t think of a more perfect match for Valentine’s Day.
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Warm Bodies (2013)

Warm Bodies Zombie Holt

Okay, let’s put on the breaks for a bit. We’ve had a slew of mean spirited films that slice and dice their way through Valentine’s Day – but sometimes you just need some good old fashioned light-hearted vibes. Warm Bodies is way more romantic comedy than horror – but it satires the zombie sub genre so well that it’s a perfect flick for horror fans and also great for a feel good romantic time.
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Sightseers (2012)

Sightseers Movie

It’s unavoidable that things start to get a bit stale after being in a relationship for a while. That’s why you have to start trying new things, you know, like getting interested in your significant other’s hobbies.

Sightseers shows us all how to reignite passion and love. A boring road trip between Tina and Chris turns into an amazing romp once Tina realizes her boyfriend has a hobby for killing people. Not only does she realize her love for him is more powerful than her concerns over murder – it’s actually so strong that she starts sharing this hobby with him and jumping in on the violence. Forget couples counseling. Just watch this film and your relationship will be A-okay!
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May (2002)

May Movie

I’ve covered obsession, kid love, and everlasting love – but now we need a horror movie for the lonely people out there. The unrequited love, if you will. And May fits the bill perfectly. This film is about a lonely young woman whose only real friend is a creepy doll. Of course it would be boring to try and learn some social skills – so May does the next best thing, kill people and piece their body parts together into one new “best friend flesh doll.”
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My Bloody Valentine (3D & Original)

My Bloody Valentine Remake

I’m going to cheat a little bit here and make this entry a double feature. My Bloody Valentine is one of the quintessential Valentine fright flicks. And in this humble author’s opinion, the 3-D remake is just as good as the original. So if you’re feeling more “classic” this weekend. I’d say go with the original for some good old fashioned slasher fun. But if you want something a little more zaney (and the most memorable full frontal nudity scene in 3-D history) then find some 3-D glasses and get ready for the perfect February 14th film.

Well, except for this last one…
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Bride of Frankenstein (1935)

Bride of Frankenstein

This is for those classic people I was just mentioning above. Yes, My Bloody Valentine might be the obvious #1 pick – but The Bride of Frankenstein is one of the most classic and iconic monster couples in horror history. Of course, relationships never really do go very smoothly – but it makes for one hell of a landmark film. A must see for any horror fan on Valentine’s Day.

 

I think 10 movies are the most I can fit into one Valentine’s Day. But if there’s any movies you all think I missed, shout out in the comments below. You can also take to social media by visiting our official Facebook and Twitter pages.

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About The Author

Derek normally needs to talk to himself in order to sort out his life. So naturally he likes to write online. He also loves all things horror... but is squeemish around blood in real life. You can also watch him fail at twitter at @doofguy15.